Monday

This Saturday Noah and I are going to Niagara Falls for the night, I'm really looking forward to having a Mommy and Noah day, I really think he needs to spend some one on one time with me.

I got an email from Alan today, Fiona's CT scan is booked for Monday, we have to be at Sick Kids at 9:30 am, the scan is at 10:30. I'm so nervous, I hope that they only need to poke her once to get the IV in. We go back on Friday to get the results, I know that something isn't right with the left side.

I'm praying that she doesn't need anymore surgery. I know that she does have some kind of cyst on her left eye, I don't know if it's from the plates and hardware dissolving. I guess we will find everything out next Friday :(

Starting to panic

I've been taking pictures of Fiona's head every month to watch the transformation from the surgery. I've emailed them pictures before when I was worried and they have always emailed me back saying everything was OK. Our last appointment was in April, we were told that we would not have to go back.
On Friday I emailed a picture of Fiona's head to Alan at Sick Kids, I was a bit concerned because her left side is really flat compared to the right, I got an email back saying that they want her to go for a CT scan in which she will have to be sedated again. I was NEVER expecting that answer in the email. They said that it looks like she had some bone resorption which I still don't understand.
I felt her head, the right orbital bone looks and feels great, the left feels like it sunk in and she has some soft spots around it.
I'm anxiously waiting for them to call me with the scan date, they said that they will try to get it done within the next 2 weeks if not it won't be until August because Dr. Phillips is off the last 2 weeks of July.
I'm so nervous, I can't imagine facing another surgery.

Career Change

Well Keri is going for it, he is going to change careers. I'm very happy for him but I'm also jealous, he is going to school, he is bettering his life and I'm stuck. We both can't afford to do it, plus I have to take care of the kids. I just always seem to be on the back burner, I guess that's my own fault. Everyone is losing jobs because of gas prices and the economy. I make crap money, and my job is boring, the only good thing is Lynn Droy, she has become one of my best friends. I think we both feel the same way, it's a comfort thing.

Pissed off

Some kid took Noah's baseball glove, Noah gave it to an older kid to play with for a while, well the kid didn't give it back, he told Noah that it "fell off" his hand and he couldn't find it.
Why the hell aren't kids being raised properly? Noah would NEVER do that to another child. Now Noah is suffering because of it, he won't confront this brat so I called the school today, hopefully something is done about this. I don't want Noah to be a push over.
I ended up buying Noah another glove yesterday but we wouldn't let him bring it to school today, he had a total meltdown this morning, poor kid, but I didn't want another one lost or stolen again, I can't afford to keep replacing them.
The funny thing is, we wrote Noah's name in marker inside the glove, I know that if my child brought something home with another child's name in it I would question it.

Why won't she sleep?

Fiona is almost 19 months old, she has not slept through the night once, well the day of surgery she slept all night.
It's so frustrating, she goes to sleep no problem but she won't stay asleep, she wants to sleep with me, I want her to get used to sleeping on her own. Last night we both had a major breakdown, I was trying to let her cry it out, she started screaming at the top of her lungs, so I tried to calm her down by picking her up, well that didn't work, she threw herself backwards and was inconsolable. I started crying also. Keri came in and I yelled at him to get out, I had it under control, but I didn't I started yelling "Make her stop crying". I felt like she was a newborn again, I had all those feeling come rushing back, it was awful.
I don't know what to do, I'm so sleep deprived, I need sleep!!!

We raised $1000.00

I'm so happy, my goal was $500.00 for the sick kids walk, and we raised $1000.00. I thought maybe this would be the last year that we do it because I donate every month to Sick Kids hospital, but I want to do the walk again next year, I won't ask for any donations, Keri and I will just give money. I have to give back to Sick Kids anyway I can. I owe them, they were wonderful with Fiona. We are so lucky to have one of the best children's hospitals right near us.
We met so many families who have to pay to stay in motels and hotels because they are from out of town. One thing that Keri and I promised to each other was, if we ever won the lottery, we would give a ton of money to Sick Kids, but we would also open a house, like a Ronald McDonald house so that families can stay close to their children.

Sick Kids Walk

Last year we did the Sick Kids walk....I raised $1300.00. This year so far I raised $850.00. I'm so happy because all the proceeds go right to Sick Kids hospital. Here are a couple of pictures from last year. I will add this years pictures on Sunday after the walk. Fi will be wearing her awesome cranio shirt that my peep Candice from CK designed, and I'll be wearing my CK shirt again.